Learning to love Croydon

This is where I confess that I have not always loved living in this town. I first moved here in the late 1990s, with my family. I've made several attempts to move away but ended up moving back. As a teenager, I found central Croydon soulless and ugly. Grey buildings under a grey sky, punctuated by grey, windswept, traffic-choked dual carriageways. The only way to get across the dual carriageways was through dingy, smelly underpasses. The shopping centres were filled with generic chain stores. The only thing I liked was the fast trains taking me to more interesting places, like central London and Brighton.

Whitgift Centre c. 2001

Looking back, the real reason I hated living in Croydon was that I didn't have friends here and I lacked the confidence to put myself into situations where I might make new friends. I didn't have much appreciation for nature or for history. I took the bustling town centre for granted. I enjoyed browsing HMV and Virgin Megastores for CDs but had little other interest in shopping. At night, the bright lights illuminating the town centre buildings meant it was never really dark outside - the overcast sky was the colour of baked beans. I even wrote an essay for GCSE English about how much I disliked Croydon (sadly I don't seem to have a copy anymore).

Graffiti from Park Hill in 2011 (no longer there)

Old & new on the High Street, Feb 2020

I think things really started to change for me in the summer of 2011. I had just returned from spending several months travelling in New Zealand and Australia, where the beautiful landscapes and exotic wildlife had got me into photography. New Zealand is a relatively young country and the high earthquake risk means that many buildings have had to be rebuilt to make them quake proof. The lack of older buildings really made me notice and appreciate the detailed layers of history we have here. 

Honeybee on echinacea, July 2011

Having struggled with mental health problems in the past and realising that a lack of purpose was central to this, I decided to try to find beauty to photograph in my local area. Noticing insects, birds, cloud patterns, sunsets and interesting buildings helped me to get outside of my own thoughts. I visited parks - some for the first time, others for the first time since childhood. 

Croydon from Duppas Hill, July 2011

In August 2011, when Croydon suffered the effects of the riots, I felt sad for the town I called home and I felt the loss of the Reeves furniture store, a building I don't remember taking much notice of until I saw its smouldering remains. I have a large collection of photos taken in the days after this, but I won't include any here because it's not how I like to think of Croydon. The sense of loss strengthened my bond with the town and seeing it under attack made me want to defend it. On a more positive note, there's been a huge amount built in my time here and I like to be able to look back at what was there before.

Now-demolished part of St George's Walk, August 2018

My memories of this town are a palimpsest, where I can still remember what used to be there, but those memories are prone to fading or getting muddled. 2011 was a reminder that my surroundings can change forever in an instant. When I used to use a film camera, often disposable cameras, I would sometimes use up the last few shots on the roll on my way to get the film developed. Looking through old photos now, I value these images of my local area as I remember it far more than the photos of places I went on holiday once. Since 2011, I've made an effort to photograph the seemingly mundane, to create a record of my own.

Saffron Central rainbow display for Croydon Pride, 2017

In 2016, I first got involved in community gardening, at Saffron Central, on the site of the former Taberner House council building in central Croydon, next to the Queens Gardens. For the first time, I started to feel connected to the community and part of something bigger and I got better at talking to new people. I met people who are very active in the community and connected to lots of different projects. I started volunteering at Park Hill community garden as well. I no longer feel anonymous and it is a good feeling. Since the March 2020 lockdown, the local community has become more important than ever. Walking around the town centre and local parks and saying hello to people who recognise me has really helped my mental health. 

Hutchinson's Bank, October 2020

Lockdown has also made me realise that certain public spaces are much better known than others. There is a huge amount of green space but people don't always know where to find it. This led to some parks being packed in the spring and summer while in others I was walking for 15 minutes without seeing anybody. I created a map and shared it on Twitter but I realised that there's more I want to share about these places than can fit into 280 characters.